Gunnar
08-10-2007, 07:24 PM
> You aware that Jeff Foxworthy is now picking on
> >Michigan? Read on.
> >(pretty funny and accurate)
> >
> >1. If you consider it a sport to gather your food
> >by drilling through
> >18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping
> >that the food will swim
> >by, you might live in Michigan.
> >
> >2. If you're proud that your region makes the
> >national news 96 nights
> >each year because Pellston is the coldest spot in
> >the nation, you might
> >live in Michigan.
> > 3. If your local Dairy Queen is closed from
> >November through March,
> >you might live in Michigan.
> >
> >4. If you instinctively walk like a penguin for
> >five months out of
> >the year, you might live in Michigan.
> >
> >5. &nbs p;If someone in a store offers you assistance, and
> >they don't work
> >there, you might live in Michigan
> >
> >6. If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving
> >around the middle of
> >his forehead, you might live in Michigan.
> >
> >
> >
> >7. If you have worn shorts and a coat at the same
> >time, you might
> >live in Michigan.
> >
> >8. If your town has an equal number of bars and
> >churches, you might
> >live in Michigan.
> >
> >9. If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation
> >with someone who
> >dialed a wrong number, you might live in Michigan.
> >
> >Part 2 - You know you're a true MICHIGANIAN /
> >MICHIGANDER when . . .
> >
> >1. "Vacation" means going up north on I-75.
> >
> >2. You measure distance in hours.
> >
> >3. You know several people who have hit a deer more
> >than once.
> >
> >4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same
> >day.
> >
> >5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow
> >during a raging
> >blizzard, without flinching.
> >
> >6. You see people wearing camouflage at social
> >events (including
> >weddings).
> >
> >7. You install security lights on your house and
> >garage and leave both
> >unlocked.
> >
> >8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your
> >girlfriend knows how
> >to use them.
> >
> >9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit
> >over a snowsuit.
> >
> >10. Driving is better in the winter because the
> >potholes are filled
> >with snow.
> >
> >11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter,
> >still winter and
> >road construction.
> >
> >12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
> >
> >13. Your idea of creative landscapin g is a statue of
> >a deer next to
> >your blue spruce.
> >
> >14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking
> >age.
> >
> >15. Down South to you means Ohio.
> >
> >16. A brat is something you eat.
> >
> >17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his
> >new pole barn.
> >
> >18. You go out to fish fry every Friday.
> >
> >19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to
> >frost.
> >
> >20. You have more miles on your snow blower than
> >your car.
> >
> >21. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly." < BR>
> >22. You drink pop and bake with soda.
> >
> >23. Your doctor tells you to drink Vernors and you
> >know it's not
> >medicine.
> >
> >
> >
> >24. You can actually drink Vernors without coughing
> >
> >25. You know what a Yooper is.
> >
> >26. You think owning a Hon da is Un-American.
> >
> >27. You know that UP is a place, not a direction.
> >
> >28. You know it's possible to live in a thumb.
> >
> >29. You understand that when visiting Detroit, the
> >best thing to wear
> >is a Kevlar vest.
> >
> >30. You actually understand these jokes, and you
> >forward them to all you Michigan friends.
> >Michigan? Read on.
> >(pretty funny and accurate)
> >
> >1. If you consider it a sport to gather your food
> >by drilling through
> >18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping
> >that the food will swim
> >by, you might live in Michigan.
> >
> >2. If you're proud that your region makes the
> >national news 96 nights
> >each year because Pellston is the coldest spot in
> >the nation, you might
> >live in Michigan.
> > 3. If your local Dairy Queen is closed from
> >November through March,
> >you might live in Michigan.
> >
> >4. If you instinctively walk like a penguin for
> >five months out of
> >the year, you might live in Michigan.
> >
> >5. &nbs p;If someone in a store offers you assistance, and
> >they don't work
> >there, you might live in Michigan
> >
> >6. If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving
> >around the middle of
> >his forehead, you might live in Michigan.
> >
> >
> >
> >7. If you have worn shorts and a coat at the same
> >time, you might
> >live in Michigan.
> >
> >8. If your town has an equal number of bars and
> >churches, you might
> >live in Michigan.
> >
> >9. If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation
> >with someone who
> >dialed a wrong number, you might live in Michigan.
> >
> >Part 2 - You know you're a true MICHIGANIAN /
> >MICHIGANDER when . . .
> >
> >1. "Vacation" means going up north on I-75.
> >
> >2. You measure distance in hours.
> >
> >3. You know several people who have hit a deer more
> >than once.
> >
> >4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same
> >day.
> >
> >5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow
> >during a raging
> >blizzard, without flinching.
> >
> >6. You see people wearing camouflage at social
> >events (including
> >weddings).
> >
> >7. You install security lights on your house and
> >garage and leave both
> >unlocked.
> >
> >8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your
> >girlfriend knows how
> >to use them.
> >
> >9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit
> >over a snowsuit.
> >
> >10. Driving is better in the winter because the
> >potholes are filled
> >with snow.
> >
> >11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter,
> >still winter and
> >road construction.
> >
> >12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
> >
> >13. Your idea of creative landscapin g is a statue of
> >a deer next to
> >your blue spruce.
> >
> >14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking
> >age.
> >
> >15. Down South to you means Ohio.
> >
> >16. A brat is something you eat.
> >
> >17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his
> >new pole barn.
> >
> >18. You go out to fish fry every Friday.
> >
> >19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to
> >frost.
> >
> >20. You have more miles on your snow blower than
> >your car.
> >
> >21. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly." < BR>
> >22. You drink pop and bake with soda.
> >
> >23. Your doctor tells you to drink Vernors and you
> >know it's not
> >medicine.
> >
> >
> >
> >24. You can actually drink Vernors without coughing
> >
> >25. You know what a Yooper is.
> >
> >26. You think owning a Hon da is Un-American.
> >
> >27. You know that UP is a place, not a direction.
> >
> >28. You know it's possible to live in a thumb.
> >
> >29. You understand that when visiting Detroit, the
> >best thing to wear
> >is a Kevlar vest.
> >
> >30. You actually understand these jokes, and you
> >forward them to all you Michigan friends.